It's the last day of the year. I wasn't going to post, but I started listen to music as I was going to get ready to go out for tonight, and Coldplay's "Clocks" came on. I would say that this song is the saddest song I have ever heard, but every time I heard a new song from them, it beats the previous "saddest-song-ever" titleholder.

I don't wanna get philosophical about the end of 2002 and the beginning of the New Year, but I kinda can't help it. I wanna say, "2003, the start of greater, newer endeavors," but one particular day should not be the commencement for all this. I should take initiative and do these things now. I've sorta done that with working out and making attempts at cleaning my room the past couple of weeks, but being broke the last 2 weeks complicated matters. I'm not going to make any promises to myself I know I won't keep, but I'm feeling optimistic; I'll see good results with my school work and, quite possibily, my love life. Of course, all of this revolves around losing 40 pounds and beginning to tone my body back to what I had prior to last August 2001, which I know I'll be able to do. That is, if I survive tonight. I have a funny feeling about tonight.

I hate being broke!! This has got to stop.

I am casually looking around for a second job, but there are several classes I'm planning on taking for the spring semester. Actually, this period reminds me of the Winter break back in 96-97 when I was on break from UCR working at KFC and took my Greyhound trip to Colorado. I was so broke and bored and lonely during that time. I'm not that desperate now, but I'm really bored. I hate being broke.

Was invited by Troy to go to Pecs but didn't want to go out...go through the trouble of showers, picking something to wear, driving there to only hang out for like 5 mintues, get bored, and leave. If I had money it wouldn't be a problem - I could find my own entertainment. HEY - not THAT kind of entertainment... "I show you my special trophy of war!" But I could play pool, music, and drink as much as I want. Plus I could eat!! I can't wait until the 31st when I get paid.